Homeschooling Through a Parent’s Eyes: Real Feedback You Need to Know

This blog is in continuation of my previous blog, "Home schooling vs Traditional schooling", this time with honest and authentic conversation with two most amazing women I know!

Linking my previous blog here, just in case you have missed it, you can read it here and come back to continue with this blog.

Home schooling vs Traditional schooling, or Unschooling! Advantages and disadvantages! Understanding the best method for your child | Easy Learning Space by Pooja

Homeschooling is no longer just an alternative—it’s a growing choice for many families worldwide. But what does it actually feel like to teach your child at home instead of sending them to a traditional school? To find out, we spoke directly with parents who are homeschooling their children. In this blog, you’ll hear their real feedback, experiences, and honest opinions about the joys, challenges, and everyday realities of homeschooling. Whether you are considering homeschooling, curious about unschooling, or weighing it against traditional schooling, these firsthand insights will help you understand what truly works—and what doesn’t—from the perspective of parents living it every day.

In my quest to dig deeper, I happened to come in contact with two amazing women (I do have mutual friends with them) who homeschool their children. I heard so many wonderful things about them from my friends, I just felt they would be absolutely brilliant to give us in detail and hands on experience about what goes behind the scenes. The decision making, the planning, the questions, breaking traditional molds all everything else. I am so grateful to both of them Thank you so much wonderful ladies. So, let's dive in.

Parent 1: Meet Devika Naren, a computer engineer and MBA by profession. She works in the field of cybersecurity. An avid reader since childhood and an accompaniment for that is love for writing. She runs book clubs for adults and collects curated children's books for her child. She is also a long-distance swimmer. She also loves math, art, music and history. Her husband is a Mechanical and Computer Science Engineer with Management degree from MIT Sloan. He is a hands-on person for all things science, engineering and everything in between. He collects and restores vintage cars, has profound interest in photography, radios, space technology and possesses photographic memory and deep fascination for details.

Parent 2 : Meet Haritha Valli, the founder of The Kosha Reading Club with 12+ years of experience in teaching under various fields for children's and adults. She kicked off her career as a software trainer for skilled professionals (Doctors, engineers etc.) with undergrad in BSc Stats and a higher diploma in software engineering. She is also a French tutor. She like painting, designing clothes, photography. She loves travelling and exploring new cultures, She loves to discover new cuisines all over the world! In her own words she says "I'm a saint on the inside and a child on the outside! I find joy in the little things!".

My questions to both of them were the same. Their answers however completely changed my perspective about schooling and parenting to an extent. I feel so grateful to cross paths with such amazing minds. Here is the discussion below I had with Devika. 1.

1.Pooja : Any particular reason for opting home schooling for your child?

Devika : As discerning parents, my husband and I examined our own experiences as schoolkids and realized that, by tweaking our lives a bit, we could provide better experiences for the child by homeschooling him. For understand this alternative, we read several books, spoke many thinkers and experts as well as other parents who have explored other schooling choices.

We realized as school going kids, we limited our friendships to other children from the same community, same neighbourhood, thereby similar family structures, economic backgrounds, sometimes even same religious community.

We realized that most of the time we were limited to the syllabus provided by the school or curriculum, bound to the textbook and class notes. There was very little encouragement to explore our own individual, creative answers or interests.

We also realized that as each individual we learned differently, and the same individual learned different things differently, sometimes even a combination of methodologies. But systemically, schools do not work on this understanding. It had to be catered only in one way for all.

We concluded that we forgot most of the things taught to us in school as soon as the exam was over, whereas the things we explored ourselves, or nurtured deeply are what have remained rooted within us all along.

Most schools impart a system of competitiveness, from the start each child is pitted against the other, whether explicitly or not. Teachers are bound to compare, contrast, scale and judge.

From the moment the child steps into the school he is watched, examined and scrutinized both for his behaviour as well as academics. For fourteen long years, every single day, he cannot escape the watchful eye or a teacher or a custodian. The system is so unforgiving, he cannot slip even a single test or quiz. These are all extracting the most out of the child in the most taxing way, daily.

The implication of this stringent system in young, impressionable children are bullying, loss of confidence, self-deprecating thoughts, mental illness, exposure to abusive habits, recalcitrant behaviour.

Another deprecating system that schools follow is the system of moving from one unrelated subject to another. By the time they are engrossed in one topic, the bell rings and its time for a totally unrelated subject. This way, the child learns things in silos. In the real world, that is not how things work. In the Ancient Ages, there was no such demarcation of subjects. Math and music can be related, science can be explained keeping history in perspective

In the homeschool system we follow the child does not learn to pass a test. Also, there are no shackles of following a syllabus. Anything the child can understand and is deeply interested in, is learned. This lets the child understand that learning something is a pleasure for its own sake. Not to please another person, or to fulfil an arbitrary education standard education

As parents we are not teachers, but facilitators. We help the child find the resource he needs to learn something. This could be an expert, teacher, Internet resource, documentary, book, or even a field visit. We also develop our habits and interests which in turn enhances their own habits and interests. The motto is “Inspire, not Require”. For example, reading parents inculcate reading children. Parents that discuss and debate respectfully, raise children that think critically.

A child is a gift to us to nurture, to enjoy and participate in his growth. Not someone to caged in a Ferris Wheel. Bringing Up of a child is akin to gardening. The soil, environment, nutrients need to be balanced mindfully to nourish and nurture the plant.

2. Pooja: What are the advantages of home schooling your child?

Devika : Autonomy, Freedom, pace, follow child’s unique learning techniques, more time with child, child develops closeness to family. More exposed to real life. Not chained to four walls. The day is planned to suit both child’s and family’s needs. His choice and decision are respected. This gives him the chance to ponder and make decisions as well as understand and respect other’s needs. I believe these are useful skills for the future.

Time is the biggest advantage. It gives us opportunities to be fully rested, cook and eat food at comfortable pace, explore nature, read a lot of books, do experiments, practice music, pursue sports, and arts, experience science in real life, meet people of all ages, explore different learning methodologies, build dioramas, Lego structures, sculpt a papier-mâché, bond over boardgames, cooking, visit museums and expositions, the list goes on..

There is also the time, the elbow room, to talk about feelings and emotions, or question something they did not find comfortable, in us parents, or outsiders.

Family and Social: It also helps the child understand family dynamics and how each contribute to the household and became an integral part of it.

It also gives ample opportunities to meet other people of disparate backgrounds and cultures, and even age. They join us on errands to banks, post offices, wherever it is safe and conducive for children.

Discipline: We do not believe discipline is something that is followed because to is imposed on us. Discipline is waking up early morning to attend a bird watching session, or to do music Riyaz because you so want to. Discipline is understanding that the sport trainer expects timely attendance and dietary discipline. Discipline is also understanding that the school going friend has few spare hours during exam time and therefore play timings need to be carefully planned.

Lastly, the learning is a two-way traffic. Many times, we have been inspired by the child’s particular interest that has inspired us to learn more. For example, my son has advanced to higher levels in music that has inspired me to pursue music as well. This also shows the child that learning doesn’t stop at any age.

3. Pooja: We all live in a society where 97% of the students go to traditional schools and I think you interact with them all the time. What is the difference you notice about traditional schooled children and home-schooled children?

Devika: Mostly, all children are quite alike. My son has equal number of homeschooled friends as well as non homeschooled friends. But the difference I notice is mostly the understanding that learning is not confined to textbooks or what is taught in school. All children are innately curious, but homeschooled children are not afraid to find rabbit holes to dig deep and dense. They are also interested in a horde of things, as they a more exposed to the external world. They are more understanding of what the parent is capable of providing, in terms of time and monetary resources. They are not afraid of voicing their opinion. They are also very respectful of their teachers by understanding that respect begets respect.

I also feel that at the moment of writing, the child shares close bond with the parent (while not impinging on each other’s space and time).

4. Pooja: If the student who is home-schooled wants to join regular school, what is the criteria? Do regular school view the students differently?

Devika: Education is a birth right for every citizen, so schools cannot deny without adequate reasoning. Most often, schools only need to check if the child has skills required for the particular grade applied for. For this a test and/or interview should suffice.

As far as I know, most school admission officers are aware of homeschooled children. Also, there are plenty of smaller alternate schools with founders who believe in ecelectic ways of leaning, that welcome homeschooled children and give conducive atmosphere for the homeschooled child to fit in and enjoy.

5. Pooja: Do Indian schools recognize home schooling? What happens when the child reaches grade 10 and must receive official passing certificate for future education purpose

Devika: Absolutely.

The Government of India established the National Open School System, also called the NIOS (at par with the CBSE system or even better as they have vocational subjects as well) as long ago as 1980 for the express purpose of providing secondary and senior secondary school leaving certification exams to all citizens older than 14 years of age. This is not just an equivalency, but a Board by the Central Government, in order to educate all its citizens irrespective of their abilities. This helps not only children of different abilities, but also Sports children, and adults who did not have a privilege to complete school education.

The NIOS Board is universally recognized and can be used for admissions to any university in the world.

For further details, please visit: https://www.nios.ac.in/. The other option is to pursue the Cambridge Board as private candidate.

My interview Harita is in audio form. I wanted to present her views in a very raw and unadulterated form, authentic, uncensored in the exact way she sent it to me. Like I mentioned the questions are the same and the perspectives too very similar.